Loving myself

Despite the cellulite, the rolls and the fact that I can not see over my boobs I love me. I have never practiced self hating behavior and I thank God because I imagine how destroying that could be to your self confidence. Yes I would love to lose a lb. or a 100 and be healthy but sometimes you have to hold your head and high and say ( insert your name ) you are beautiful.

Normally I would say all of that without the makeup without the straight hair and probably with a t-shirt or a mu mu on and my hair a curly mess. And you know why? JMN loves me . unconditionally.. you jealous huh? I know I know everyone isn't lucky.

 

After the wedding I was feeling extra cute. ( it probably had to do with the 4 Uv & sprites I had before I left the wedding. And the wondering around Wal-Mart.

But here you go ....

 

Then it all came crashing down the next morning . haha
how do people do this everyday? Oh well it was nice while it lasted.

ULTA

Hey guys!

Enjoy!

Ulta

Vaughn - Holland Wedding

 I was in a wedding a couple weeks ago. One of my good friends Laquita got married . I was one of the bridesmaids. I didn't know anyone previously and I did not have an anxiety attack nor did I say anything completely stupid. Thank GOd!

Let me tell you this wedding had its fair of drama but I am not here to trash talk or speak ill of anyone BUT ( smacks lips like Tamar) HUNTY you find out who are really your friends when you get married. Folks go get real stupid when you get a ring slipped on their hand.  I don't know that it is.

 

The wedding was BEAUTIFUL. The bride was Beautiful. I am pretty sure this is the nicest wedding I have ever attended and been apart of. ( sorry other friends)

I am sorry to report that I do not even have enough pictures to show you guys. I  know I have failed but since I was in the wedding I gave my Nikon to JMN for him to savor the moment and he failed all of us miserably. ( rolls eyes)

 

Here is the little bit I have....

 YASSSS - straight hair and makeup that made me feel like a goddess. ( I have the craziest hair story to tell yall)

 

Here we are!

MOH ,the Beautiful bride,and myself.

 Shout out to the handsome man that walked me down the aisle, payless shoes for the painful shoes wore, Sabryna (beautybybryna (IG) for enhancing God masterpiece , David's Bridal for making something that clinged to my butt the way it did, and my momma and sperm donor for crafting this luscious boootay!

Progress???

I got sweet message from my friend Hoguii today. She was creeping my IG and told me that I look smaller and more tone than this picture I took on IG 19 weeks.

of course I had to inspect it. I would hope in the last 19 weeks I would have done a whole lot more but hey ill take it.
This is me in the gym last week. My plan is to go to the gym 5x a week for 30 minutes . I should be able to commit to it. And if I do I have a reward set in mind. I just have to get to May 1st. And if I fall below 5 I have to push my date back. So currently I am at May 2nd.  I will try to keep you guys in the loop.

cute huh?
#warhawks

Manetabolism : The catch up

 Hey guys! I'm going to take a mini break from my video Manetabolism updates . If you miss the first 2 click here & here .

 This is a picture of me from August. As you can tell my fro was getting really tall and if I would have bent my head over you would see all the Carmel in my head. ( great color but there was more dyed than the tips of my bangs which made me look like an early 2000s Eminem.)

 

  

Here is a couple days after September when I went to get my hair trimmed. I came out looking like a little boy. I know I know I am apparently the queen of getting bad hair cuts but let me tell you guys I took this one a whole lot better than the other 2 times I got a little too much cut off. Literally you could not pull a curl from my head. Majority of my caramel was cut out also.

Luckily I had already started taking Manetabolism  .

These two pictures are  from December. Guys this stuff is a miracle. I got a small trim in November to correct the hair cut I received but these vitamins have really kept my hair healthy and you can see that my hair has gotten longer and thicker. I follow Mane choice on instagram and they had an amazing 40% off sale ( which broke their server that's how good their products are) I got a 4 month supply. And I cant even imagine what my hair is going to look like when  I am done with it. I am hoping they will have another sale by that time so I can stock up again.
Check out Man Choice Manetabolism!

Indecisiveness and people who are always Late

These two types of people happen to be my pet peeve. And I think it is magnified due to the people I am constantly around . I have a couple of friends who think time revolves around them . I mean to the extent that they are always late and they are mad that you complain because you should always know they are going to be late ... What kind of mess is that ?

Than I have another friend that literally has to weigh out every option before she commits and even then she isn't 100% on what she picked . Getting her to the car is always a 30-45 process and most of the time you have to almost leave her to get her in the car.

I need people to get with the program of life. 

Mini van vacation

I really do have amazing friends. I mean I see them M-F and on the weekends I miss them. I came up with the brilliant idea of going to Pearl MS to the Outlets of MS. These Outlets have maybe been open for a little under a year. And I love to get a good deal so I thought my friends would love to get some shopping done as well.

I am the only kid-less one in the group so I knew the seating situation would be a little iffy. Haylee has 2 kids but she managed to have her husband watch them for a couple of hours. Laquita has a 5 year old and Chelsey has a now 1 year old that she usually has in tow. Usually my mouth runs without being able to think about all the details so when it came to transporting us I was thinking well we are going to have to take 2 separate vehicles. ( Which totally sucks) BUT Haylee borrowed her moms super cool mini van and all of us were able to fit comfortably.

Pearl is about 2 hours away from us. So we left about 10 am on a Saturday. We got to stop at Whataburger in Vicksburg for Lunch/ Breakfast. Then when we crossed the MS line we had to pullover and snap some pictures.

 M was loving on bby B during the drive.

 

The Outlets of MS were real cute! They had very clean bathrooms.

Stores

 After we shopped til we dropped we went to this restaurant called Georgia Blue.. OMG it was amazing. If you are in Pearl or Hattiesburg please check it out!

Bands will make her dance

Guess what I got guys?
BANDS actually one band. But I have 6 weeks with this bad boy and hopefully I will be able to remember to keep it on. I go back to the Ortho the first week of December. My Ortho said that this band will help correct my alignment situation. When I received my consultation for my braces he stated that to get the best results would be to get my jaw broken to have it realigned. My jaw is very strong.  ( thanks) But after watching the surgery on YouTube ( which was awesome) I decided that I really did not have the time to recover from that. Also I've never had a major surgery and it seems kind of petty to have that done. I'm paying off my braces 6 months early ( woot woot) and I hope it get them off in April.

A lot of my friends have been telling me that bands come at the end of the braces process. To me my teeth still aren't the straightest. When I go get my teeth cleaned in January I am going to ask my dentist what he thinks about me getting a second opinion from another orthodontist . I have paid a lot of money for these suckers so when they are removed I want my teeth to be GOREGOUS. Also I plan on getting my teeth whitened and shaved .

( check out those lips)

Lion football

Its always a good time when you go back to your Alma mater. Every time I step foot back on Ouachita premises I get chills and memories come flooding back.
And its super fun to share theses moments with our nieces and nephews.

 

Dear MOM

Dear momma

Thank you for all the things you've done for me . I don't mean to sound generic but I realize that I did not grow up in the manner that you might have wished I would have .

I had a great childhood. I want you to know as a single parent you really went above and beyond to provide for me. I always had clothes on my back, my hair was combed, you took me to church, we vacationed , you made sure I went to a good school, you made sure I had a normal childhood.

Of course majority of those things I didn't realize weren't normal until I grew up. I realized that some parents don't work and they wait for other people to provide for their children . I realize that some parents don't instill morals, values or even have positive expectations for their children . Parents don't cook meals, help with homework or meet their children's teachers. 

But you did all of that and more.

As a single parent you raised me to be independent, caring , and giving .

Sometimes when I'm mad at you I don't remember all these things . I don't even think I've told you any of this before actually . 

As I got older I began to pick up on some of the hatred that you had for people. I learned that I didn't need anyone and I could/ would be better off on my own. Unfortunately I saw it as I no longer needed you. Because you could no longer provide me with my wants and needs in the current times as compared to my friends and their families .

In high school I needed you more than ever. I don't remember ever being home . I had a car that you paid insurance and gas for and I rode around every night until I decided I no longer wanted to live in your household. I never wanted to disrespect you. I never wanted you to ever think less of me . But I was doing things that I wasn't ready for. Things that I thought made me an adult . And the only person I had to talk and reason about it was myself .

I don't know anyone else who not allowed their 17 year old daughter to move out their house but also financially supported them .  

I went to college . And the distance between us really started . 

When I see you I can't tell you how depressed I get . There are a lot of girls my age that calls their mom their best friend . I happen to not be able to do that. You know nothing about me . I know nothing about you . We seem to be on different planets.

I am realizing that I am soooo broken . Our relationship is broken . I feel incapable of showing or expressing myself to you without tears . Then I feel embarrassed for even crying because I feel as if you would look down on me for doing so.

I so badly need us to be fixed . But I'm not sure if we've gone too long .

You failed to give me the correct view of life, self confidence, and relationships with men..................... I feel like you forgot to give me your key to life. Which I so desperately needed.

Chris Brown ++ Music Review++ X

X’ Track List
1. ‘X’
2. ‘Add Me In’
3. ‘Loyal’ (feat. Lil Wayne & Tyga)
4. ‘New Flame’ (feat. Usher & Rick Ross)
5. ‘Songs On 12 Play’ (feat. Trey Songz)
6. ’101′ (Interlude)
7. ‘Drown In It’ (feat. R. Kelly)
8. ‘Came to Do’ (feat. Akon)
9. ‘Stereotype’
10. ‘Time for Love’
11. ‘Lady in a Glass Dress (Interlude)’
12. ‘Autumn Leaves’ (feat. Kendrick Lamar)
13. ‘Do Better’ (feat. Brandy)
14. ‘See You Around’
15. ‘Don’t Be Gone Too Long’ (feat. Ariana Grande)
16. ‘Body Shots’
17. ‘Drunk Texting’ (feat. Jhene Aiko)
Bonus Tracks (Deluxe Edition)
18. ‘Lost in Ya Love’
19. ‘Love More’ (feat. Nicki Minaj)
20. ‘Don’t Think They Know’ (feat. Aaliyah)
21. ‘Fine China’

X was suppose to be released a year ago. I believe it was Dec 3. I actually went to Target to look for it and when it wasn't on the shelves I was soooo disappointed . I thought Target was boycotting against Chris and I was going to have to buy It on iTunes. ( I hate getting music on iTunes)

It was pushed back to Sept 16 . I went to target and purchased the deluxe addition.
21 tracks! So far there has been 5 singles already released from this album. And I have loved every single one of them.

My favorite songs
Add me in
Loyal
New Flame
Came to do
Lady in a Glass Dress
Autumn Leaves
Do Better
Love More
Fine China

Love the interludes- I like the people he chose to do features-But I am always disappointed when it comes to Chris Brown because I feel like he has an album of singles. Not a complete body of work. I do believe this time his music is very personal. X seems like its a straight jab to Rihanna. Not that she doesn't deserve some jabs but its clear that Chris feels like his life has been altered due to know her and being in a relationship with her.

Brandy's on X. I LOVE BRANDY. But B do you have to use the N word?  The N word isn't useful in my language and in your image this beautiful r&b singer shouldn't be used. * just saying*

Chris you are right these hoes aint loyal. You are absolutely correct.

My friend Laquita and I were discussing Lady in a Glass Dress. She thought that maybe he was peeping at a girl in a revealing outfit. Who wants attention.  I said that there's this girl and she's all dressed up probably doing things that she wouldn't normally do. But he is saying I can you right thru all of your pain. He knows her intentions even though others might not . * Shugs *

Lady in a glass dress

Lady in a glass dress
I can see right through you
You act like you don't want this
But you know that you do
Since he broke your heart, girl
You say that you won't love again
And you won't let his type girl
But we know in the end

You still dream (dream)
You still dream (dream)
Baby, I can make your dreams come true

Oh, oh
My lady in the glass dress
Oh, oh


I commend Chris Brown for just persevering through all the crap he's been through. I hope he will continue to make quality music.

New Music++ Tinashe++ Aquarious

I live in Louisiana and music and everything comes here last. So in attempts to stay current I travel, read blogs, and watch interviews. A couple weeks ago I was watching Power 105.1 The Breakfast Club and Tinashe - Tee|na|she was the guest. I've heard 2 on , on the radio several times. It took me awhile to decided to actually fully listen to it. Then I had the hardest time figuring out what exactly she was saying. ( I didn't realize she was saying 2 on) I began to like it but I was just singing my on lyrics to it.

So after this interview I was like I like her let me find out every bit of information I can find out about her. So I Googled and stalked her IG.

 

Tuesday I was in Target and saw that Cartwheel ( download it) had her album for 10% off. her album was only 9.99 and with the 10% off it was 8.99. That's a steal for a album with 18 tracks. Plus I am always wanting to do what I can to revive the R&B community. I immediately popped her into my CD player and went about my work. After 2 hours I took it out thinking geez this was a waste of 9 dollars.

 But then after listening to TI new album Papwerwork -I decided I was going to give Tinashe another chance . Sometimes you can listen to an album but you aren't really listening to it and that's what I did the first time I listened to Aquarius.

 

 Aquarius debuted on Oct 7

Track listing

 

1) Aquarius
2) Bet (Ft. Devonté Hynes)
3) Cold Sweat
4) Nightfall (Interlude)
5) 2 On (ft. ScHoolboy Q)
6) How Many Times (Ft. Future)
7) What Is There To Lose (interlude)
8) Pretend (ft. A$AP Rocky)
9) All Hands On Deck
10) Indigo Child (interlude)
11) Far Side Of The Moon
12) The Calm (interlude)
13) Feels Like Vegas
14) Thug Cry
15) Deep In The Night (interlude)
16) Bated Breath
17) Wildfire
18) The Storm (Outro)

 

I started to really enjoy the album and its been in my CD player ever since. But when I put it in my computer to download it to iTunes it came up as Pop on the genre section. That really made me mad. Who picks what genre music goes to? There isn't any poppy songs on this album.

 

Here are some things I like about the album. Overall there are 18 tracks. The purchase price for the album was very reasonable. There are some very heavy 808s on some of the tracks. And I enjoy the fact that for her first ALBUM not mixtape she has been able to link with a lot of heavy weights in the hip hop world. ex DJ Mustard. In an interview she stated that she is the only female Mustard has done a song for . That's an awesome accomplishment. The song titles are very unique. Sometimes with music titles overlap or are generic.  I love the guitar riff on the second song. And I really enjoy that she put interludes on Aquarius . There isn't a lit of people who still think about interludes. To me they make an album more cohesive.

 

With that being said this is an R&b album there are 4 features. True R&b doesn't need a feature from a rapper! That's what a remix is for. I haven't seen a remix in forever. Do y'all remember when Mariah had a CD just full of remixes. Her albums didn't have features after features. The real reason I have to rant about the features and because I could care less for the people who messed up a perfectly good song.  ASAP Rocky I hear is doing big things but once again I live in Louisiana so we don't have any of his music on our stations. And I know that radio hits are no longer important to some artists and when you have quality material and a following it shouldn't. BUT for example my most favorite song on the Aquarius is " How many times." Future who I can not decipher any of his lyrics nor like any of his videos is featured on it . Listen to How many times Here . According to the lyrics Direct lyrics doesn't even know what he says half the time.

 

Verse 3, Future]
Hit ya from the back seat
Smokin' hot pot beat
I'mma hit ya hard
I'mma put your face in the pillow
[?] like cinderella
Kiss you like till you catch a feeling round your nipple
Turn up on a nigga
(Straight Up)
Turn up, turn up, in your mouth
(Straight Up)
Bend you over on the couch
Baby get on her knees
Young [?] make you tick
Fuck you like [?] real dick
[?] bitch, lick, lick

Source: http://www.directlyrics.com/tinashe-how-many-times-lyrics.html

 

 

Verse 3, Future]
Hit ya from the back seat
Smokin' hot pot beat
I'mma hit ya hard
I'mma put your face in the pillow
[?] like cinderella
Kiss you like till you catch a feeling round your nipple
Turn up on a nigga
(Straight Up)
Turn up, turn up, in your mouth
(Straight Up)
Bend you over on the couch
Baby get on her knees
Young [?] make you tick
Fuck you like [?] real dick
[?] bitch, lick, lick

Source: http://www.directlyrics.com/tinashe-how-many-times-lyrics.htmlHit ya from the back seat
Smokin' hot pot beat
I'mma hit ya hard
I'mma put your face in the pillow
Split you like a cigarillo
Kiss you like till you catch a feeling round your nipple
Turn up on a
(Straight Up)
Turn up, turn up, in your mouth
(Straight Up)
Bend you over on the couch
Baby get in the mix
Young fit mixed chick
Fuck you like real dick
Shit bitch, lick, lick

 

What do you think about that? Totally messed up my favorite song.

 

Favorite songs on Aquarius

How many times

Bated Breath

All Hand on Deck

Cold Sweat

Feels like Vegas

 

When I popped in the CD the first song reminds me of Rihanna's Rated R album and I was thinking we already have a Rihanna we don't need another. But Tinashe has an amazing vocal range. I think if she just sat on the stage on a stool I would pay to watch her sing . She is just one of those talented people. One thing I wish is that she could tell me more of a story . I think first albums should be a story book. And yes she's is young but she's experienced probably more than any of us in all our years. I hope to see that in her 2nd album 2-3 years from now. I wish her nothing but success. Hopefully she can revive r&b.

 

Verse 3, Future]
Hit ya from the back seat
Smokin' hot pot beat
I'mma hit ya hard
I'mma put your face in the pillow
[?] like cinderella
Kiss you like till you catch a feeling round your nipple
Turn up on a nigga
(Straight Up)
Turn up, turn up, in your mouth
(Straight Up)
Bend you over on the couch
Baby get on her knees
Young [?] make you tick
Fuck you like [?] real dick
[?] bitch, lick, lick

Source: http://www.directlyrics.com/tinashe-how-many-times-lyrics.html

 

Movie Review +++ Addicted++ Zane

I was introduced to Zane when I was in high school. Her books changed my life. Okay my sexual life. Addicted was the first book I read by Zane.

I loved it so I read the rest of them in the span of a year. I didn't have the biggest allowance so I went to the Parish Library and checked them out one by one. Until I was caught up.

A couple years later I took a break from reading because I was living the books content. One of her novels became a TV series on Cinamax. I think I caught a couple episodes but not the entire season.

 

One evening I was in the movie theater. Sharon Leal popped across my screen as well as Boris Kodjoe  . At the end of the preview did I realize that Addicted had been brought to life before my very eyes. I was beyond excited. I went to see it the week it came out with my friend Mindy. I didn't brush up on the book to compare how accurate the book and the movie were before watching. Keep in mind I read this book 10 years ago.

 

Read about the book here and if you are wanting to compare and contrast the book read the review from Carmen. She broken down the book and the movie in an amazing way. Don't read the spoilers unless you are wanting to be spoiled.

 

Addicted preview

Due to lack of back story, lack of sex , and lack of all of the sex partners I give this movie a 3/5

But I do understand that when you have a book like this you cant have a 3 hour movie to fit everyone and everything in it. But due to the amazing cast in the movie I have to give it a higher rating. For Zane's first movie it was good. I am looking forward to seeing more. Sex Chronicles? Shame on it all? Hot box?

 

 

Bluegreen Vacations Branson MO

Part 3 of Branson has finally arrived. If you missed part 1 & 2 please click click click to check them out! The entire point of us going to Branson is to check out the " time shares" at Big Cedar. So yes Pay 100 for 2 nights so you can be persuaded/conned into buying a 10,000 time share. The lodge was beautiful. I think it made me realize how lucky we are to be able to travel and do the things we do on a regular basis.

I think its crazy because these views are someone's every day life. Although there really isn't any time or space in our lives that would make me want to 100% live a life like this it makes a awesome thought and memory.

There were 2 restaurants on the grounds. We went to Buzzard Bar. JMN had a steak and I have a delectable cheese burger.

The time shares were really good prices . And if you have a family there are amazing accommodations that can be made. We decided that this wasn't the time to get one for ourselves but it did make us decide to add it to the list of life accomplishments.

Blue Green Vacations